I’m losing a good friend.

Discussion in 'Fred's Barcalounge' started by radd, Jan 14, 2022 at 6:43 PM.

  1. radd

    radd Country Gent

    Dec 27, 2017
    Santa Cruz
    Alzheimer’s….I hate it. Been through this a few times in my family. Now a good friend is in what some call stage 5.

    We had not gotten together in a couple years due to, well you know what, and his sweetheart of a wife just informed me.

    George is a tall very handsome, incredibly charming man who is a retired CHP motor officer. We taught motorcycling together for the CHP sponsored California program for a number of years.

    What a blast he was to teach with. We also rode motor support for bicycle races carrying race officials along the course to keep all the riders honest.

    He is not what you would think of as a retired officer. He was a bleeding heart liberal who found the most difficult aspect of being an officer was he had to stop smoking pot…Funny guy.

    Anyway, I do hate this disease….Thanks for “listening”
    Last edited: Jan 14, 2022 at 11:54 PM
  2. oneforsorrow

    oneforsorrow Synchromatic

    May 15, 2020
    I am so sorry. He sounds like the best kind of guy. Sending good vibes your way and for his loved ones.
    Duo Slinger and radd like this.
  3. ZackyDog

    ZackyDog Friend of Fred

    Feb 6, 2015
    In the USA
    Sorry, radd. That and other illnesses are so unforgiving, for lack of a better word. My dad has dementia.
  4. radd

    radd Country Gent

    Dec 27, 2017
    Santa Cruz
    I’m m sorry to hear that. I hope you and your dad has good supports.
    ZackyDog likes this.
  5. tmcq65

    tmcq65 Electromatic

    Nov 10, 2021
    Radd and ZackyDog - my heart goes out to both of you. I lost my father almost four years ago now to dementia. What an unbelievably cruel illness. We lose our loved ones twice. Cherish every minute.
    radd likes this.
  6. MrWookiee

    MrWookiee Country Gent

    Jun 17, 2020
    SoCal, USA
    I'm sorry, radd. Sending good vibes to you and ZackyDog. My aunt and uncle in PA are both in later stages as well (she's a "basket case", and he's somewhat better). Mom is also in a memory care facility in NorCal, for dementia. Horrible, horrible disease!
    radd likes this.
  7. OzzPocket

    OzzPocket Synchromatic

    Aug 11, 2020
    It's a horrible thing. My mother was exhibiting signs of dementia before she passed.....it really makes things difficult not only for them, but for everyone around them. I'm sorry to hear that your friend is having problems.

    But...remember...you aren't really losing your friend....he's there....and now is when he needs you more than ever.
    MrWookiee, radd and Duo Slinger like this.
  8. Teledriver

    Teledriver Synchromatic

    Feb 12, 2011
    Iowa City, IA
    Alzheimer's and dementia has started to hit those around me in the past few years. Maybe 10 good acquaintances in the past 5 years. Talking 80+ year-olds, parents of close friends.
    It's rough and tough. Seeing things that aren't there, bringing up arguments on a phone-call that happened 30+ years ago, etc.
    I'm 53. The parents of the my classmate from high-school have been getting hit with these two conditions, as has the friends of my mom (age 81). Wondering how long before it starts to hit my same-age classmate, or me.

    My uncle (uncle-in-law) has been under the Alzheimer's shadow for about 10 years. I can remember seeing him out in public and he started to 'not know me', if you get my meaning. His wife, aunt Shirley (mom's sister), would say my name and chit/chat, and he'd go with it (but really you could tell he wasn't really 100% sure of the situation)...

    These weren't 60's hippies taking LSD, but Iowa farmers working the land. Some of my friends' parents totally urban (no farm chemicals) but typical 1950's teenagers that have developed this issue...

    Yeah, it sux.
    And it makes me feel OLD~, lol
    new6659, MrWookiee and radd like this.
  9. radd

    radd Country Gent

    Dec 27, 2017
    Santa Cruz
    $5,000 a month for the memory unit his wife has to move him to shortly……..Just crazy sad on so many levels.
  10. Drock2k1

    Drock2k1 Synchromatic

    Feb 26, 2013
    I “liked this” because there isn’t an “I’m sorry” button. Praying for comfort, it is a horrible disease.
    NJDevil, new6659, MrWookiee and 2 others like this.
  11. section2

    section2 Country Gent

    Dec 21, 2016
    I'm so sorry. I'm sending love and prayers.
    radd likes this.
  12. thunder58

    thunder58 Super Moderator Staff Member

    Dec 23, 2010
    tappan ny
    Admin Post
    So sorry . Reach out anytime Radd
    5120mantis and radd like this.
  13. NJDevil

    NJDevil Country Gent

    Jul 9, 2014
    Commack, NY
    My prayers and good wishes are with him and his family. Alzheimer's is demonic in its attack. I was just 4 when my grandmother got it and only took 2 years for her to lose all abilities to communicate except to point and babble.......which that went quickly too.

    Now my father has it but at 85 y/o, his progression is not the usual and actually showed signs back in '03.....just a year after his Diabetes diagnosis which runs in the family. So I think this is dimentia from this vs. genetic Alzheimer's. Either way, it is brutal and unforgiving.
    radd likes this.
  14. Andrew Griffin

    Andrew Griffin Synchromatic

    Oct 22, 2015
    I'm sorry to read this. My father suffered from early onset Alzheimers and it caught him at his 65th year. I feel for his wife and friends. I've learned the greatest respect for the caregivers because it's very hard.
    radd and MrWookiee like this.
  15. TV the Wired Turtle

    TV the Wired Turtle Gretschified

    Jul 25, 2009
    Sandy Eggo
    While Parkenson's is not the same, it still robs us of people we love like Alzheimers. I have a great friend that has shared the stage w me for many yrs playing n singing. Ironically like with your pal. My friend Dr. Dan was also a Big handsome man that we would refer to as sunshine, cuz when he walked into the building the place lit up. Parkensons has its horrible hand on him now, in fact its the plus version so he's been downed to being wheeled around, and recently had to get a trache in order to swallow food. He's still fighting the good fight to play his guitar and mando, even trying to still sing w that new device. He's so talented as a picker and singer, then this sh#t had to mow him over over the years. Dr Dan is not done blessing his family and every day is a gift still, I must say. He wrote a book about his fight, its still on amazon I think. All to say I feel for you, I know what this stuff does first hand, I've watched his family struggle and fight along side him. ... I'm so sorry to hear about your friend's battle.
    Craig Encinitas and radd like this.
  16. stiv

    stiv Country Gent

    Sep 12, 2014
    Firenze, Italy
    Sorry man, I’ve had both grandpa and grandma (from my mom’s side of the family) dealing with that (Alzheimer and dementia) so I know what you’re talking about.
    Luckily (if you could say so) it happened when they were both old (my grandpa took care of my grandma’s Alzheimer when she became ill only to be hit with dementia himself at the end of his life) so they didn’t have to suffer that much.
    Keep it up mate.
    radd likes this.
  17. loudnlousy

    loudnlousy Gretschified

    Oct 18, 2015
    That`s so sad.
    I witnessed one of my customers getting ill. It only took 4 months to turn a healthy, funny and sports-loving person into a nursing-case.
    Prayers sent.
    Last edited: Jan 15, 2022 at 1:10 PM
    radd likes this.
  18. drmilktruck

    drmilktruck I Bleed Orange

    May 17, 2009
    Plymouth, MN
    Dementia is cruel to everyone - the patient, family and friends, caregivers. My sympathies to anyone affected by it.
    GlenP and radd like this.
  19. swivel

    swivel Country Gent

    May 13, 2018
    That's tough. I hate that disease and those like it. I'd rather just have a heart attack and go.
    JC higgy and radd like this.
  20. radd

    radd Country Gent

    Dec 27, 2017
    Santa Cruz
    George always said he would rather die than have Alzheimer’s. His wife just told me that he has to have a diagnosis stating he has less than 6 months to live in order to qualify for the right to die with dignity pill in California. I’m sure she researched this but I chose not to tell her he can’t qualify because the patient must be of sound mind and must take the pill themselves…. Sadly, that can’t happen with George like it did a few months ago with my dear friends wife.
    swivel likes this.
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