Most Embarrassing Moment NGC

Discussion in 'Fred's Barcalounge' started by drmilktruck, Jan 13, 2019.

  1. drmilktruck

    drmilktruck Gretschified

    May 17, 2009
    Plymouth, MN
    Yesterday I went into the bathroom after lunch. Like many men (and some women) I often read on the toilet if I’m going to be there a bit. I lifted the lid and turned around. Intent on my book, I didn’t realize that Mrs MT had recently cleaned the toilet and the brush was drying under the seat with the brush head over the toilet bowl. I started to sit down. When those bristles hit a sensitive spot I jerked back and hit the toilet tank, breaking it. Water poured onto the floor, soaking my socks and the bottom of my jeans that were around my ankles. The water supply, sensing the emptying tank, poured more liquid onto the floor. I managed to get my pants up and turned off the water. I ran out, got a mop and started to clean the floor. Mrs MT said the water was dripping down into the utility room, even with the water turned off it keep dripping. We called a plumber, concerned that the force had also damaged the cheap plastic tubing used now instead of copper pipes and it was leaking.

    At time and a half, Manny came out and said there was no damage to the pipes. He replaced the toilet. Total cost: $560.

    I got a new sturdy toilet out of the deal at least, an American Standard. Not quite a Ferguson but it'll do.

    Last edited: Jan 13, 2019
  2. Jockabilly

    Jockabilly Synchromatic

    Sep 15, 2018
    My most embarrassing moment ever was as a wee lad of about five years old. Went to the toilet then did up my zip fly too quick and caught myself between the teeth if you know what I mean. Went to my folks in a panic. The folks called an ambulance which, looking back on it was a bit excessive when they could have driven me to Accident and Emergency. When the ambulance arrived they cut away my jeans leaving just the zip fly attached to my, um, person and then drove me off to hospital. After what seemed like hours sitting in the Accident and Emergency department a doctor came along, took one look, got out some scissors and cut the bottom off the zip and, hey presto! the zip parted freeing me with no damage done. This was followed by a trip home in my father car in my underpants in the dead of winter.

    Looking back I am amazed that my father, a long serving RAF airman didn't think of the extremely simple solution of breaking the zip and saving me from a great deal of embarrassment.

    This has become a family story with my brother even telling it to the assembled guests at my wedding at which he was 'Best Man'.
    JHowdy, MotorCentaur, RomanS and 7 others like this.
  3. Beardog

    Beardog Synchromatic

    Apr 15, 2018
    Nova Scotia
    Well that sucks!
    drmilktruck likes this.
  4. manunk

    manunk Electromatic

    My friend used to do his laundry in a public laundromat. Put all his underwear in the dryer with his other clothes. He realized that he'd thrown his undies into a dryer being used by a couple of lovely punkrock ladies. Too shy to tell them. They took his undies home in their laundry.

    Then my friend started a nice new office job, all his new coworkers female. I was taken desk to desk to be introduced to each one. Sat down. Realized his fly was open and he was commando (see above). Poor stupid pal. At least he played guitar well.
  5. calebaaron666

    calebaaron666 Country Gent

    Aug 15, 2018
    Portland, Maine
  6. dak55

    dak55 Synchromatic

    May 31, 2018
    Mills River NC
    So many responses, but after running them through my internal filtering system, I've got nothing. Hope your day got better??
    MotorCentaur likes this.
  7. LivingMyDream

    LivingMyDream Country Gent

    Doc, following the 4th sentence, I was in total laugh mode - no snickering, just laughing right out loud! In part it was about set up and then the surprise, and part of it was because things like that are common to us all, so I was remembering all the embarrassing moments in my own life.

    I feel you brother!
    drmilktruck, dak55 and Jockabilly like this.
  8. tdtom

    tdtom Gretschie

    Oct 26, 2018
    new zealand
    NGC= No Guitar Content.
    Bertotti and calebaaron666 like this.
  9. markeebee

    markeebee Country Gent

    Hopefully the same was true for Jockabilly
  10. calebaaron666

    calebaaron666 Country Gent

    Aug 15, 2018
    Portland, Maine
    Ah, duh. Thanx.
    tdtom likes this.
  11. Jockabilly

    Jockabilly Synchromatic

    Sep 15, 2018
    :D:D:D I can report that there was no damage except to a young lad's ego.
    drmilktruck, dak55 and LivingMyDream like this.
  12. calebaaron666

    calebaaron666 Country Gent

    Aug 15, 2018
    Portland, Maine
    I’ve embarrassed myself so many times it’s hard to single out the MOST embarrasing moment.
    I used to drink. A lot. More than a normal person. So a lot of my stories are sad and inappropriate and in poor taste in mixed company.
    But one time....
    About 10 years ago I was dumped by a gal who finally smartened up and I used this as an excuse (not that I needed one) to go on a serious death trip free fall take no prisoners end of the world bender. After a 3 day party of which I recall very little, i found myself at a party in Portland’s Old Port district. I was on a balcony with some folks and decided it’d be awesome to climb up onto the roof. While I was on the roof, I decided I should jump up and down on a plexi glass sky light. Well,.... I went through it.
    I fell 16 feet into an empty penthouse apartment and broke my left hip. I was lucky.
    That whole thing was embarrassing enough. BUT some guy at the party took a video of me hollering and swearing and acting like a lunatic as the paramedics took me away strapped to a gurny. I heard about this video a week later and called the fella who took it. I begged and pleaded with him, and he was gracious enough to erase it (after showing i dunno how many people). To this day i wonder if it’ll ever surface and make me wanna crawl into a hole!
    The hip got better. I got some steel in there now. About a year later I changed my lifestyle, and now life is good.
    THE END. :)
    MotorCentaur, RomanS, Merc and 5 others like this.
  13. loudnlousy

    loudnlousy Friend of Fred

    Oct 18, 2015
    Hildesheim, Germany
    So, Jim: With this major incident you should statistially be "through" with any mishap in 2019. Relax.
    drmilktruck and dak55 like this.
  14. drmilktruck

    drmilktruck Gretschified

    May 17, 2009
    Plymouth, MN
    I hadn't thought about that, Frank. You're right!

    Last edited: Jan 13, 2019
    loudnlousy likes this.
  15. dafreeze

    dafreeze Friend of Fred

    Pics or it didn’t happen...I’m good for twenty if you have the video
  16. drmilktruck

    drmilktruck Gretschified

    May 17, 2009
    Plymouth, MN
    I hadn't thought about monetizing it. I could have made a mint!

    Here's the new toilet, an American Standard Champion 4 with an extended bowl. You can see the offending toilet brush to the right.

    Merc and calebaaron666 like this.
  17. Henry

    Henry Gretschified

    Apr 9, 2014
    The old bomb on a plane joke.

    2 friends are boarding a plane for a trip, and one says to the other, "I always get so nervous that a terrorist might bring a bomb onto the plane, even though there is only a 1 in 1,000,000 chance that a bomb is on the plane."

    The friend replies, "oh, I used to worry too, but i figured out how to reduce the risk that someone brings a bomb, and it doesn't bother me any more." He then cracks open his bag and shows the first friend the bomb in his bag

    The first friend asks, alarmed, "how does that help!?".

    The second friend replies, "well, the risk of TWO bombs being on a plane is 1 in 1,000,000,000,0000 . . . ."
    Far To Many and drmilktruck like this.
  18. calebaaron666

    calebaaron666 Country Gent

    Aug 15, 2018
    Portland, Maine
    I love an extended bowl! Sorry about your misfortune, but congrats in the new american standard!
    drmilktruck likes this.
  19. Bertotti

    Bertotti Country Gent

    Jul 20, 2017
    South Dakota
    I thought it meant nice green crap! Ever eat a big bowl of crunch berries?

    Doc that is priceless, I have one of their toilets and wish I didn’t. With a septic tank system, I have learned it is better to stop the offending kids giant bats rather than send a snake down my drains to get the flow going again!

    It happens at least three times a year over the last ten years. It has been getting better. What the heck is with kids and baseball bats!
    Last edited: Jan 13, 2019
    drmilktruck likes this.
  20. thunder58

    thunder58 I Bleed Orange

    Dec 23, 2010
    tappan ny
    After reading the original post ... I dare not write what was going through my mind ... PM sent Jim ...... LOL :p
    drmilktruck likes this.
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