Is it Rude ....x2

Discussion in 'Fred's Barcalounge' started by Zeek, Dec 8, 2019.

  1. Zeek

    Zeek Synchromatic

    May 29, 2016
    Illinos USA
    My mom in law has lived with us for awhile and the past few weeks have been ruff for her. We brought her home today. All the family came by to see her and do their thing.

    One nephew plays guitar and a few other instruments, today he had his banjo. We migrated to the guitar/amp area of the home and we started jammin together. He had my electromatic I was playing my Nashville. I had him running through a separate amp clean and I was running my rig.

    I had to go in the other room and when I came back he had the Nashville..... Not a problem....... He was also playing with my pedals .... Ok I get it mash a button an rock out (I think he mashed them all at once lol).. but then He started twisting knobs.. Ya knobs .. not like I had them set were I wanted them lol.

    I didnt get a chance to play again till just a lil while ago when everyone had left.....Now nothin cant get a sound out of it, I traced it down to my Nailhead Trem O Flow. I unhooked it and everything seemed to work. Hard to believe that the Trem went bad so this will take more investigation.

    My question .....x2

    1. Is it rude to adjust another man or womans pedal settings when you play there stuff ??

    I can understand mashing buttons .... but turning knobs....

    Am I just a big tool ???.... Yes...huge ... but... Is that rude?

    2. Is it rude to change a DIRTY diaper put it in a trash can and not tell anyone.

    I think both are.

    My wife agrees, dont touch my knobs but is on the fence when it comes to the diaper. Now she isn't wrong very often ... just ask her.
    But I told her she needed plumed up on this one... Its rude.

    Could I be wrong ??? 1/2 wrong ?? Lol
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2019
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  2. new6659

    new6659 Synchromatic

    Dec 10, 2018
    Southwestern Ontario
    No, you're right.
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  3. Scott Fraser

    Scott Fraser Country Gent

    Jan 14, 2012
    Los Angeles
    First of all, no one should pick up somebody else's instrument without being invited.
    Turn volume knobs, ok, everything else, strictly off limits. You're right, your nephew needs to learn a few lessons.
  4. audept

    audept Senior Gretsch-Talker

    Dec 1, 2010
    Sydney, Australia
    Rude and wrong!
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  5. Merc

    Merc Country Gent

    May 6, 2017
    1. I wouldn’t pick up anther players guitar without asking, even my brothers. The same goes with adjusting knobs.

    2. We always had old plastic bags or even doggy bags at times in the diaper bag. Then take them with us or at least to the outside trash barrel after tying up the bag to reduce odors. It’s courtesy and part of being prepared just like having a spare diaper. That being said, it can be tough and tiring with a baby or toddler. And sometimes parents should get cut a little slack at times. Maybe they ran out of bags. But often I find that even with my in-laws who have kids... every parent seems to have different standards for what was acceptable and what isn’t.
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  6. unknown fan

    unknown fan Gretschie

    Aug 7, 2018
    He should have asked for sure - that's always a touchy situation, no pun intended
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  7. Henry

    Henry Gretschified

    Apr 9, 2014
    You're right.
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  8. ramjac

    ramjac Synchromatic

    Aug 14, 2011
    Old enough to know better or a teenager? Seems to me that from about age 15-17 they don’t worry too much about the consequences of rudeness when it comes to controlling their impulses. Might as well talk to the wall.

    You might explain to him that Chuck Berry punched Keith Richards for touching his guitar and that Nigel Tufnel scolded Marty DiBergi for just looking at one.
    DennisC and Zeek like this.
  9. T Bone

    T Bone Country Gent

    Rude, ×2. Maybe 3. I wouldn't think of adjusting someone's pedals. Of course I am judging the situation through my own filters.

    And the diaper business? Qualifier, I don't have kids, but it seems a plastic bag and then asking where to take it (outside) should be a minimum.
    Zeek likes this.
  10. Henry

    Henry Gretschified

    Apr 9, 2014
    Also, I always use my phone and take pics of my amp and pedal board settings before I move them, you could do the same.
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  11. Zeek

    Zeek Synchromatic

    May 29, 2016
    Illinos USA
    Adult ... with kids lol
  12. Sean McILwaine

    Sean McILwaine Synchromatic

    Dec 26, 2012
    London UK
    Inconsiderate on both counts. Maybe next time they visit a gentle talk on how long it takes to set your system up, educate your nephew on the process and and get in first by telling them where to put the nappy if the baby needs changing. Best to try to avoid a family discourse if possible. Of course if they don't care I guess they will not be visiting that often in the future.
    Zeek likes this.
  13. Ricochet

    Ricochet I Bleed Orange

    Nov 13, 2009
    Monkey Island
    Both would raise an eye brow, but there would no problem.

    You were already sharing your gear. I can see your nephew might have thought you were cool with him playing your rig. I would ask him about the trem though.
    wabash slim likes this.
  14. thunder58

    thunder58 Super Moderator Staff Member

    Dec 23, 2010
    tappan ny
    Admin Post
    Well here's Thunders take on this :
    Sure , it aggravated you that your nephew turned the knobs on the pedals ( i'm thinking he's teen-age years , we where all there ) I am strong on the phrase " give the gift of music " . If it were me ....
    " hey Johnny , listen , please ask me to use the Nashville next time . It's really my better guitar and you'll understand when you get a Gretsch of your own "....
    When it comes to the pedals .... I would have explained to him why I had them set the way they were and perhaps watched a video together of some of the pedals on You Tube to teach and learn what each pedal does .
    Oh the parenting thing ..... ( yea , I'm sure our wives are related :p ) Believe me and you we all know a dirty diaper can smell worse then the garbage pail it sits in but unfortunately they must be changed at any given time .....offer this suggestion " ya know what we use to do ( or what someone else use to do ) " , we'd put the dirty diaper in a " zip-lock " bag and then throw it away ...or we carried " zip-lock " bags with us all the time in the diaper bag . Reason : what if someone need to crush down the garbage pail with their foot or and to make more room ??
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  15. larryb

    larryb Gretschified

    Oct 29, 2012
    Greenville, SC
    Is it rude? From his point of view?....probably wasn't trying to upset you, just wasn't thinking it would....No point in trying to wonder what his intentions were....Simply tell him to please not touch your gear without asking...problem solved
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  16. speedicut

    speedicut Friend of Fred

    Jun 5, 2012
    The gear one is easy... don't touch anything unless specifically given permission.

    I'm torn on the diaper issue.
    If it was hidden in the trash just to get rid of it, you should have been told.
    However, if it was hidden the trash as a statement/prank/payback, I'm all for it.
    pmac11 and Zeek like this.
  17. Zeek

    Zeek Synchromatic

    May 29, 2016
    Illinos USA
    I will have a chat with him about it, I cant say I am mad at him and I dont mind him playing my guitar. After all I did hand him one..... And I will hand him one again.

    I wouldnt turn knobs..... If I felt the need, Id say hey can I turn your knobs.

    I dont look in medicine cabinets either.

    As far as the diaper, my Son was 7 when we met so I missed a few stages of child raising.

    I understand things happen. I would probably say....

    Hey my kid just dropped a deuce where can I put this smelly diaper since I cant flush it, or I put a dirty diaper in you trash can..... if you cant tell. Lol

    It is all good and more family will be visiting and I welcome that as we are in the waiting stage.

    A few more guitar players will show up and I will hand them a guitar and cable also and we will all play together and enjoy music and celebrate life.

    Maybe Im just rude on top of being a Tool.
    larryb likes this.
  18. wabash slim

    wabash slim Friend of Fred

    Feb 10, 2010
    lafayette in
    1. Next time, ask to try the guitar.
    2. Knobs can be turned back. It may be annoying, but it's easily reversible. Mark your settings down. Show the kid why they are set that way. Make it a learning experience.
    3. Diaper? Put it in a plastic bag---a grocery store bag works fine. Nobody---NOBODY---wants to smell the nasty little bio bombs your toddler creates. It'd be better to take them out to the bin instead of the trash can in the kitchen. I love kids, but have always wondered how someone so small and sweet can produce something so foul and nasty.
    Zeek likes this.
  19. johnny g

    johnny g Country Gent

    Sep 2, 2017
    union, ms
    I don't have much but what I have belongs to me. I don't like anybody, not invited, to touch my gear.
  20. musicman100

    musicman100 Country Gent

    Aug 15, 2008
    I can’t really see the issue, I’m sure he didn’t mean to upset you but it clearly has.

    it’s only gear, there’s bigger issues in life to worry about.
    CalicoSkies, Dave-B, Zeek and 2 others like this.
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